Sunday, 23 November 2008

C is the toughest man south of the picket wire

C relaxing after a hard day's bricklaying

Picked up a gender analysing website from Norm. You put in a website and it tells you whether the writer of it is male or female. Turns out Norm is an effeminate, limp-wristed, mere 76% male. How could that be? He's Australian! *

Thought I'd try it myself and, yup, solid gold 85% male. But that was nothing to C, the website gender analyser declares her 95% male.

All those years of marriage. So that was the secret! Why hadn't I noticed the beard and the gun before?


*Late correction. Norm is Zimbabwean, from Bulawayo. (Notes from both him and Contentious, the latter in Comments. Apologies to Norm. I must have thought he was Australian because he often quotes from the Sydney Morning Herald.) And is in thrall to the Australian cricket team. Oh well, Zimbabwean... 76% is quite in order then.

ps According to another all-wise analyser (analyzer for US types) I am a visionary. I knew it. I could tell, you know. 85% male AND visionary. You can't do better than me at the moment, as U A Fanthorpe's St George once so memorably said.

So gissa job. Quick, before I quit.

Via the Trots.


The Contentious Centrist said...

Norm is not Australian.

Norman Geras was born in Bulawayo, Southern Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe).

Mark Granier said...

Here's how it reads my site:

We guess is written by a woman (54%), however it's quite gender neutral.

So my wrist is so limp it's in danger of falling off entirely. I'm kind of used to this. In the 1990s, when I shared a flat with my cousin D in Bray, a girl we both knew told us that she'd had to "defend you guys", because lots of people were convinced we were a gay couple (never mind that D had a girlfriend). Both D and I had the same reaction: we thought this consensus hilarious and quite delightful, as if we'd been wearing disguises so brilliant they fooled even ourselves. Sadly though, our friend didn't seem to appreciate the humour. Nor did she act on our suggestion that she send round a couple of her female friends who might be interested in putting their presumption to the test. Anyway, I've already booked my rebirth ticket: I've coming back as a woman, definitely (though probably not for the most PC of reasons).

Poet in Residence said...

poet-in-residence 84% male bardontherun 94% male
perhaps those mannish words 'poet' and 'bard' kind of give it away.
C looks lovely. Pic. reminds me. We are going to paint the main room. We have loads of those coloured sqaures that you hold up to the light. No turquoise though. Could I live with it for more than a week? I don't know.

The Plump said...

This fat man is a fat woman. Funny I never noticed it before.

Mark Granier said...

Yes, it is a nice photo of C; looks like someone just rubbed the base of the lamp (on the right) and she appeared like a perfectly composed genie.

George S said...

Yes, the lamp, Mark. I suspect it is an alien being about to beam her up into space. She looks pretty relaxed about it though.

The colour is a touch misleading. Slightly deeper and greener than that, without being green. A deep and silky dark turquoise. The house is generally on the richly coloured side, not to mention three walls of self-painted (meaning C and I) murals. If we ever wanted to sell it, according to conventional wisdom, we should cover it all in Magnolia off white.

And Norm has corrected me, Noga. Foolish of me. I have of course spoken to him and there wasn't much Oz in the accent now I recall.

Poet in Residence said...

I am not a visionary like you George. I appear to be more of a Doer (PiR) and a Mechanic (BoR). Well, you can 'and me t' spanner and t' oily rag and you'll have a long wait. It's me bruvver you want. I'm the one wit' ten thumbs.

Jonathan Wonham said...


In fact, you're "The Visionary" on:

and "The Mechanic" on:

Could this possibly indicate that you have a dual personality?

I am "The Doer" on both of my blogs. Apparently, I may have a problem with sitting still.

Anonymous said...

I'm 85% man. Yeah baby.