Thursday 29 September 2011

Frivolity, fribble and procrastination: death by clerihew 3 and out



The Great Kendo... upon whom clerihews may be bestowed.

So we left the tag match / lumberjack contest with Duhig in the ring trying fancy moves, but here comes Adam Horovitz with a spectacular clothesline:

Horovitz
Jaques Tati
gets rather ratty
when people say
he's a French Will Hay.

Brought back to British comedy of the thirtes (a solid move), Andy Jackson is back in the fray, raising the tone:

Jackson
J Night Shyamalan
Was thought the coming man
But his career now declines
We should have seen the Signs.

Few saw that one coming. I go for the Mid-Atlantic position;


Szirtes
Mack Sennet
as scripted by Alan Bennett:
all wistful charm and poise
with The Keystone Cops as The History Boys.

Duhig does what is technically known as The Italian Job, then twists himself upright again:

Duhig
Luchino Visconti
Saw 'The Full Monty'
Which he thought was vile,
Bar Robert Carlyle.

Katy Evans-Bush goes off-piste:

Evans-Bush
Richard Burton
drew the curtain
over his marriages. Regarding divorce,
He drank, and expressed remorse
.

Now almost everyone is in the ring. Duhig goes for another continental shoulder press:

Duhig
Dario Argento
Never went lento;
Though he made Giallo,
His films weren't shallow.

I counter with one that looks continental - a sly move I picked up from Kendo Nagasaki:

Szirtes
Karel Reisz
was not always nice:
his Saturday Night was followed Sunday Morning.
Let this be a warning.

Admonition is an illegal move and gets a public warning. Evans-Bush goes straight down the centre this time:

Evans-Bush
Cary Grant
loved his aunt.
When he was alone,
He would try her eau de cologne.

This could well be true. But then in a fantastic turn of events, the American champion, Gentleman Alfred Corn, goes enters with an unexpectedly classic hold (he has been reading the rule book!)

Corn
Dame Edith Evans
Let fly a "Heavens!"
When Bea Lillie (Lady Peel)
Downgraded her sex appeal.

Big Jim Lindop invents an utterly new move:

Lindop
Absalom Rosencrantz,
Israeli director of the cult film "Totentanz,"
Though he may have wished it,
Never existed.

To which there is only one reply:

Szirtes
Whereas Guildernstein
thought existence perfectly fine,
though he was quite easy to embarrass
with a first name like Whereas.

Enough clerihew wrestling highlights, grapple fans, as the late Kent Walton used to say.



6 comments:

Anonymous said...

George Szirtes
Is a fan of all these.
But he can't help but curse
when approached with Free Verse.

George S said...

Anon,
go on..
If anyone looks
they'll find plenty of free verse in The Burning of the Books

Anonymous said...

It's been most merry
Reading these cleri-
hews.
But I must return to Deleuze.

George S said...

Wot no Guattari!
No Foucault? Lacan? That whole starry
gamut of theoretical boozers
knows as Deleuzers? :)

Anonymous said...

Taking a liberty -
But whilst technically free
it's not really the case,
as everything has its place

But I digress
I am doing my best
to put off returning
to some Books I am Burning

*Nota bene-
Aware I've gone astray
But this form that you teach
Has affected my speech.

George S said...

Ah Looby,
if that is who you be,
this is the subversion
version.